Le blog est organisé en actes : acte I, acte II… comme une pièce de théâtre, parce que l'histoire de Grégoire, c'est une pièce de théâtre montée de toute pièce.
I do not like to talk about my life on the Internet.
But you may be wondering why I am writing a blog.
In fact, I rewrite this summary page because so many events happened since I wrote it almost two years ago.
Who is Gregoire?
Gregoire is an happy child born in Quebec. His parents are originated from Europe. He is an happy child travelling around the world (Europe, USA, Canada, Caraïbes...). As immigrants, we did not know how the medical system is organized. In Quebec, there is a lack of doctors and medical specialist. The medical system is public and there is not private doctors (some exceptions) in this province. In fact, it was almost impossible to find a medical specialist for children in the private sector in 2009. The bad organization of the medical system in Quebec is responsible for this situation.
Unfortunately, Gregoire has a visual impairment since the age of 2 and half. He has a strong hyperopia with a strabismus. It’s quite common; unfortunately, his visual problem was badly managed in Montreal.
In 2009, at the age of 4 and half, he started to develop anxiety when he had to use fine motor skills. In fact, we did not realize the problem at this time. We had no family doctor. Gregoire saw a paediatrician once a year, but she was never available outside the yearly appointment. He saw an ophtalmologist at an hospital in Montreal. All medical examinations were very quick. Unfortunately, they forgot one aspect of his visual impairment which was only discovered in December 2012 in the province of Ontario.
After 3 years and half spent in two daycare centers where he was happy, we moved and Gregoire started to a new daycare center.
He developed anxiety when he had to focus and to use his fine motor skills. As parents, we were looking for what caused our son’s anxiety at day care center when he was absolutely not anxious at home. Lorsque nous avons cherché les causes de cette anxiété auprès de la garderie, nous sommes tombés dans un piège . When we sought the causes of his anxiety from the day care center, we stumbled into a trap. We trusted the day care center to discover why our son was anxious with them and not at home.
The daycare center made their own diagnosis of autism without any evaluation, tried to influence various professionals we could eventually meet when we were looking for solutions for our son, by making a report skillfully containing multiple lies and false interpretations so that their homemade diagnosis could be confirmed. For parents who have never been confronted to autism, we could not have guessed what this report meant. We forwarded it. Unfortunately, the report contained terms which are not very important, but when you read between the lines (as a professional can), and when you put the terms together (and when you know what autism is, normal parents cannot understand it), only a professional can.
They conditioned Gregoire psychologically, saying he was mad, he was worth nothing and humiliating him in front of other kids. Step by step, he lost all his friends. He said that nobody wanted to play with him because he was insane. Our son gradually lost his confidence through a process intense and destructive irresponsibility. In other words, 2 people from the daycare center repeated he was irresponsible of what he did and what he said. They questioned his normality and his ability to understand by declaring to us he lost his "reason" or its anchor in reality. En d'autres mots, elles ont violé sa personnalité et l'ont considéré comme un irresponsable (processus de psychiatrisation).En d'autres mots, elles ont violé sa personnalité et l'ont considéré comme un irresponsable (processus de psychiatrisation). In other words, they violated his personality and regarded him as irresponsible (psychiatry process).
Moreover, mental sufferings were inflicted to Gregoire by one assistant educator in the daycare just before an observation (not an evaluation) from a professional (not a doctor) (paid by us) in order that Gregoire adopt behaviours more suitable to the “category” of their alleged diagnosis (autism) he was supposed to enter. The daycare center used to remove his glasses when he played outside. They removed his glasses during all the observation (his vision without glasses was 1-2/10. We asked for a report of the professional. It was hard to obtain it, but as we paid her, we could finally obtain one. What we discover was a long description of horrors. We did not recognize our son, his behaviours in previous day care centers. We knew he was abused, conditioned. On the report, it’s clear that the daycare center tries to influence the professional’s point of view by telling lies.
Gregoire’s general condition when he came out of the daycare (when we discovered the lies) was absolutely indescribable. He was not the same kid we knew since his birth.
We thought we would forgot this bad story by waiting Gregoire enters school but :
He was still anxious even worse after the abuse of the daycare.
We did not have the answers of our questions : how a child can change in 3 months?
Some months later, the daycare center forwarded their homemade diagnosis to school without any proof or evaluation.
The first week was very good, as soon as they received the homemade diagnosis, they started to threaten us (why?) that if we do not want my son to be evaluated by the school, they do not accept him any more. One person from the school made us understand which diagnosis they wanted to put on him.
We left Quebec, we would never come back. One year later, we came back to Canada, but in Ontario.
We spent 80 000 dollars in Europe, Quebec and Ontario (including accommodations, loss for my company, doctors and specialists for almost nothing) to discover what happened and to have some real answers.
Gregoire has never been autistic (after two serious evaluations, one during 8 days, the other one during hours and hours) by several medical specialists.
Gregoire was declared to be advanced for his age, speaking very well, but being sad. We were separated involuntarily from my husband who was obliged to stay in Quebec.
It was discovered that he had a strong delay in fine and gross motor skills, which was not noticed one year before in the previous daycare (not the psychiatric daycare, but the bilingual daycare where he stayed 3 years). We started an intensive rehabilitation for his motor skills problems and rapid progress in gross motor skills will make that he will be finally declared as having a coordination disorder in fine motor skills by a well-established medical specialist. Multiple multidisciplinary reports broke easily the homemade diagnosis of the daycare centre. In meantime, I discovered that when a French ophtamologist changed his glasses, his global motor skills improved significantly from one day to the following. We discovered that his visual impairment was badly managed in Quebec. He had only a vision of 5/10 (long distance)... unfortunately, the French ophtalmologists forgot the short distance vision, focusing problems, a stong hypermetropic astigmatism... (following probably the Quebec doctors) which were only discovered almost one year and a half later in Ontario. When he got his progressive glasses, in some days, he reduced his writing from 2/3. Gregoire started to make costumes from the Roman and Middle Age. He discovered history when he was in Europe. He started to follow kids running and climbing in playing fields; yes, he could do it like other kids, because he had proper glasses he saw something in short distance...
His writing improved significantly. No, Gregoire does not have any developmental problem, but Gregoire has a visual impairment (more than 6 dioptries), he wears a sophisticated optical system. He is so skilled in fine motor skills now, he still has to improve his writing (does not like it so much) but now we know that everything comes from his vision. He will be able to use computer with the right software... he will be able to read properly. He learned to read with a strong short distance visual impairment...
During years, I insisted to verify his short distance vision and all ophtalmologists said that everything was right.
I have now the answer of his anxiety he had when he was 5 years old = his visual impairment. He had probably a vision loss or as he sometimes says, he thought the vision was as he saw and that every kid saw the same thing like him. Pehaps he has this since the age of 2 and by growing, he needs more and more to focus. When he started to wear progressive glasses, it was like... a miracle. Unfortunately, progressive glasses are not very adequate for reading; so, he has to wear some reading glasses, change from progressive to reading glasses...
We are homeschooling with a quite demanding corresponding course. Today, Gregoire is very creative in Art, likes Roman, Middle Age, travelling (we are very good travelers), Sciences, visiting museums everywhere, creative computer games, stories... he still needs to improve his reading...
Our journey was long, I have a kid with a visual impairment, not a kid with a developmental disorder.
I am fed up with all this unskilled people (assistant educator with no diploma) who put false diagnosis on your kid just to obtain financing. This is quite popular in some places in Quebec. I still really do not understand why some professionals, schools can take their opinion seriously. You have “popular” diagnosis to obtain financing. Autism is one of them. Unfortunately, I don’t see any link between autism and visual impairment and the consequences of bad managed visual impairment by Quebec doctors. We spent almost three years believing that Gregoire had fine motor skills problems, without considering his vision, even if, each time, I said that there was something wrong.
This Nazi daycare center in Montreal used Gregoire visual impairment which was badly managed at this time and its consequences (fine and motors skills difficulties) to prove a diagnosis they declared without any proof and any testing and in order that my son corresponds to the category, they inflicted mental and physical (remove glasses) sufferings on him to prove it. We have lost thousands of dollars by doing pointless evaluations, meeting specialists who could not help... We lost almost 3 years and pehaps Gregoire would not recover all of his vision (often before the age of 6). Why these people want to prove their theory absolutely by torturing kids?
The Quebec system does not allow you to bring a complaint. The story is too old now : 4 years. How much sufferings for nothing? How much time I’ve spent to hold his hand in order to help him to write? How often I’ve seen this child desperate trying to write, trying to focus and trying to do something he cannot achieve? How often I have tried to comfort him by saying that everything will be fine, that he will learn as other kids, because no doctor was able to see the proper visual impairment he had? Why having spent 80000 $ for almost nothing? Why are we afraid? We have done anything wrong. We paid all from our pocket and we paid very high level of taxes. Ideally, the purpose of this blog is that this story never happens again. I think it will still happen. The former Gregoire's daycare continue to label kids probably in the same way. Nobody was punished. Unfortunately, Quebec is like that!